Coaching for Power Couples, Entrepreneurial Families, and Dual Career Couples
My focus in couples and family counselling is on the interface between work and private life. This is where particular stresses arise for couples, families or friendships, which can lead to conflicts, spirals of silence and/or disappointing relationship patterns.
The Power Couple
You are a power couple, that has founded a company together. The conflicts at work spill over into the family. You are wearing many hats - and sometimes no longer know which one is the right one.
The dual career couple
Each of you has a successful career. And, of course, you support your partner. But conflict grows - starting with the choice of your hometown, weekends spent together, and when to plan your holidays. And then, there is the big issue of founding a family.
A entrepreneurial family
You are a successor to your father in the family firm. That has always been treated as a matter of fact. Your education, your career - everything has been pointing that way. But since you work with your father, everything starts to break down. For the first time in your life, you ask yourself, if the decision has been the right one for you.
So you and your father have decided to seek help make the succession successful.
Is it only work life balance - or is there more to it?
Our society takes it for granted that work and private life are separate spheres of life. We just need to find the right work-life balance. But that's not always easy. And maybe, there is more to that constant struggle.
Sometimes it is not clear, when we are at work and when we are in our private lives. If you start a business together as a couple, if you grow up in a family business, then family and business are often one and the same. Things start to become fuzzy. But when do we wear which hat? When do we speak as a father and when as a superior? When as a friend and when as a business partner?
Know your expectations
Conflicts between work and private life often arise in partnerships and families because many expectations are unconscious. The first step is therefore to clarify what expectations exist. What do I expect from my partner? What do I expect from myself? We wear many hats. - Sometimes we confuse them.
Understanding contradictions
Often, these expectations are not only unconscious. They are conflicting. We want our partner to have a succesful career - but what, if we have to limit ourselves for that goal? It's clear that your daughter will lead differently than you do - but seeing that, raises doubts. Of course as a couple you want to make decisions together - but what, if one partner wants something that the other simply can't come to terms with?
Talking about aims
We get a new understanding of our problems. ​That solves a lot - but not everything. If underlying problems become clearer, aims have to be talked about. Sometimes we can compromise. Sometimes decision have to be taken. Sometimes new, unconventional solutions can be found.
Developing acceptance
Some tensions cannot be solved. They have to be lived with. It is important to accept, what cannot be changed, in order to find your way forward. A new understanding embraces acceptance, and creative ways of handling challenges.
Looking forward
The end of a process is always a beginning. Developing roadmaps, planning with challenges, setting milestones, and scheduling regular check-ups. If you plan, with what you found, you will master the challenge.
